21 replies to this topic

[Lunarhound]

EDIT AND DISCLAIMER: I didn't think I'd need to point this out, but since people really do seem to be missing the point, this thread is intended as a lighthearted joke and/or game. The object is to find lines from the book and interpret them as off-the-wall, obviously untrue features. It is not meant to be insulting, a prank, or anything else in any way inflammatory. Come on, people. It's in the off-topic forum, uses OMG in the thread title and has multiple exclamation points. Do I really need to point out that this is all in good fun?

From Ghosts of Ascalon, page 156:

Ember bit off a short curse. "Bathing in that sewer destroyed half my powder. I don't know if I can trust the rest." She swept the damp cartridges off the rock she was using as a worktable and carefully repacked the remaining shot and powder.

There will be ammunition in GW2!!! Discuss!!!

...

No, not really. :p But how many times have we seen people do this now? They see something in the book and assume that it confirms its presence as a feature or mechanic in the game. The purpose of this thread is to have a bit of fun with that. What other features can you "confirm" from the book? Be sure to provide quotes and page numbers as evidence if possible! Let's see if we can build ourselves an accurate picture of Guild Wars 2.

It'll also be fun to see how many people respond without reading far enough into the initial post (and without recognizing that it must be in the off topic forum for a reason) to realize it's a joke.:devil:

Edited by Lunarhound, 08 August 2010 - 04:55 PM.

[Huginn]

Lunarhound said:

What other features can you "confirm" from the book?:

None, it's a book... shit...

[Jenosavel]

You had me going!  :p  Thankfully I read to the end of the post...

I've got one!

page 223 said:

Ember shot Rionna a whithering look, but Dougal stared at Ember.  Now that he thought about it, she did look like an Ash legionnaire.  Her dark clothing, her wiry build, her style of killing - it all added up.

"Not all of them are spies and assassins," Dougal said.

See!  It's confirmed.  Clearly assassin and spy are going to be two more classes!  ;)  Gunner/engineer debunked!  Spy is the final class!

[Eanny]

To the contrary : it has been confirmed that bows and guns will NOT have ammunition. I cannot remember where I read it but I am pretty sure that I read it from some reliable source.

This is only a book.

... Ho wait ... this is a joke (not a very good one). Well this is more of a stupid prank. You got me, I admit it. I left my first answer to prove it. Don't be too proud. We have enough assumptions and half-truth in that forum. This post only says one thing to me : Lunarhound thinks that he is better (more clever) than most of us.

[Infamous]

lol :zzz:  Are you trollin?  ;)

[Amannelle]

Well, I don't quite understand why you'd want to make an off-topic thread just for the purpose of mockery, that's a rather cruel gesture.

I'm pretty sure they said that guns wont need powder and ammunition, though I don't know if that's actually been confirmed or not.  However, it's rather likely that catapults, turrets, etc in WvWvW will use some sort of object, whether it be a large stone, cannonball, etc. Because didn't they say we'd have to gather supplies?

Bump:

Eanny said:

Lunarhound thinks that he is better (more clever) than most of us.

^ This       :zzz:

Bump:

Jenosavel said:

See!  It's confirmed.  Clearly assassin and spy are going to be two more classes!  ;)  Gunner/engineer debunked!  Spy is the final class!

Actually, assassins and spies have been mentioned in Prophecies, before the existence of Factions.  :) They will exist, tbh, but they wont likely be professions.

[Jenosavel]

:p  Of course.

Am I the only one who found the idea of this thread amusing and wants to play along?  :qq:

There are so many moments in the book ripe for misinterpretation...

[actionjack]

It sounded like a drug reference....

[Lunarhound]

Seriously? That's actually what people got from this? That this post is meant to be humorous should be VERY obvious. And the joke isn't supposed to be in trying to fool people, it's in having fun coming up with kooky features based on circumstantial book evidence.

It's supposed to be an amusing game. Find something crazy in the book, invent a feature in the game based on it. I thought the fact that it was in off topic was enough to indicate that. If I was trying to play some sort of mean prank, I'd have put it in Tyrian Assembly or something and I would have made the whole post sound a LOT less goofy. The last line was also intended as a joke. It's a very short post. I didn't think anyone would actually comment without reading the whole thing.

I honestly didn't think it'd be necessary, but I've updated the original post with a disclaimer.

Edited by Lunarhound, 08 August 2010 - 04:57 PM.

[Eanny]

OK you serioulsy meant it at a joke and I don't have a good sense of humour. please forgive my misintrepretation.

so I found something that can be confirmed from the book : GW2 will be a MUD!!! I mean : there are only words in this book !!

Edited by Eanny, 08 August 2010 - 04:58 PM.

[Jenosavel]

Maybe I just like making things up too much.  ...it provides a nice break from all the rigorous fact checking that I require of myself everywhere else.  Also it releases the frustration towards people who seriously make ridiculous claims if you just start spinning ridiculous tales for yourself.  :D

C'mon, give it a try!  Just open to a random page of the book and make up a ridiculous assertion from anything on it.  It's fun!

Edit: OMG Eanny, that one's great!

[Amannelle]

Oh, I didn't not know you meant it for a joke. :( I thought you were trying to mock anyone who used the book to support any theory or idea whatsoever. I'm sorry for the misunderstanding. :(

[Crusader Coz]

Golemancers can create golems with either a higher speed and lower strength or vice versa.

from GoA, page 34:

"I should never have opted for strength over speed!"
Clagg shouted, "Up, Breaker! Now!"

[Huginn]

Jenosavel said:

C'mon, give it a try!  Just open to a random page of the book and make up a ridiculous assertion from anything on it.  It's fun!
!

Just because it is in the madness section, I'll do it.

Page 170 said:

Already the heavy shutters against the night air were swinging open, and a honey wagon drawn by a heavy dolyak was rattling along the street.

Omg! gw2 will have wagons drawn by dolyak that sells honey as a consumable while we are out adventuring!

something like that? still... a book is a book :p

[Lunarhound]

Amannelle said:

I thought you were trying to mock anyone who used the book to support any theory or idea whatsoever. I'm sorry for the misunderstanding. :(

Absolutely not. In fact, I think that in some cases, something's presence in the book makes it, if not officially confirmed, then at least more likely. For instance, I agree that Killeen being a necromancer makes their return even more likely than it was already. This thread is for things that are obviously (and, hopefully, humorously) untrue.

If people are taking something in Madness Incarnate this seriously, I wonder if we need a forum specifically for jokes and forum games, just so there's absolutely no question that the stuff in it is for fun. :p

Edited by Lunarhound, 08 August 2010 - 05:22 PM.

[Jenosavel]

The Asura will get to use their Norn party members as mounts!

Kranxx is riding Gullik everywhere, including the entirety of chapter 18, and even has a dysfunctional cattle prod (lightning rod) to help him out in steering his ornery pet!


And Huginn gets extra points for the irony of thinking a honey wagon is a wagon that carts around honey.  :D  Oh man, I really split a gut there!

[Amannelle]

Lunarhound said:

Absolutely not. In fact, I think that in some cases, something's presence in the book makes it, if not officially confirmed, then at least more likely. For instance, I agree that Killeen being a necromancer makes their return even more likely than it was already. This thread is for things that are obviously (and, hopefully, humorously) untrue.

If people are taking something in Madness Incarnate this seriously, I wonder if we need a forum specifically for jokes and forum games, just so there's absolutely no question that the stuff in it is for fun. :p

Ok, I'll give it a go then. :D

Page 18:

Quote

He was faced with a simple thing, a door bound in bands of iron. Clagg piloted his golem forward and shook his head at the human's reluctance.

ZOMG! All the doors are wrapped in iron rubber bands, and I even discovered the newest profession!! PILOTS! :D

I should've known all along: The goggles, the gloves, the scarf, it's obvious now that the College of Synergetics teaches Asura how to pilot golem-shaped planes. :)

[Huginn]

Jenosavel said:

And Huginn gets extra points for the irony of thinking a honey wagon is a wagon that carts around honey.  :D  Oh man, I really split a gut there!

It's... not...?

*google*

Oh...



Ew...

You learn something new everyday as they say :p

[Amannelle]

Huginn said:

It's... not...?

*wiki*

Oh...



Ew...

Lol I once had to help hose down some "honey-buckets", as they're called... Lol gotta love public porta-potties xD

[Etta]

Faulty advertising is bad.

[Ambitious]

Page 89 said:

Almorra looked sharply at Riona, her four ears flattening slightly. "You did not tell him?"

Charr can speak!

[Sirius]

Wow, who'da thunk it?